I Hate Both Presidential Candidates

This is the perfect election for left and right extremists.

For others, like yours truly, who don’t pander to one side or the other, this is hell.

Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton equally represent the absolute worst of what all of humanity has to offer. The two of them are selfish, greedy, lying, sociopathic narcissists with borderline personality disorders. I give a slight nod to Hillary Clinton in regards to who is more mentally ill.

There doesn’t appear to be a compassionate bone in either of them. I’m having difficulties recognizing which one of them is more power hungry or fundamentally evil. Both have done ridiculous amounts of harm in order to elevate their status and both of them have and continue to readily lie to cover their tracks. Both devalue human life and both seek out every opportunity to shamelessly brag about personal and professional accomplishments that truly never happened. Both have also left wakes of destroyed personal and professional relationships that have ruined peoples’ lives. Both have chosen personal enrichment over substance and honor at every turn.

Perhaps the most telling is that both claim bravery and loyalty when their lives are peppered with the exact opposite of that. Trump and Clinton are chickenshit hypocrites with delusions of grandeur. How our system ended up with these two dipshit charlatans confounds me. I guess at this point we are simply voting for who we want as Vice President.

Change of Career Choices, Fear and Aging

I made my first WordPress blog in late 2006. It was about sports. I think I wrote about how Marc Bulger was a top 5 quarterback in the NFL or something. In 2007, I made another sports blog and wrote on there for a couple of years before I burned out. I wanted to be a sports journalist. I talked to sportswriters from around the nation online (on a forum geared towards sportswriters) and practiced my passion. Then I met my first love, dated her for two and a half years before she cheated on and left me. After battling (natural) depression for a while, I wanted to go balls deep into the nutritional science field, but I took no action for a while..

After returning to (community) college in 2014 (for a reference: I graduated high school in 2009 and originally went to college that fall before dropping out by the end of the semester), I made straight A’s and decided that, for the fall of 2015, I’d change my major to pre-med, since I’d decided I wanted to be a physical therapist.

The 2015 school season, as a whole, was successful. For the first time in my life (at 24-years-old), I took chemistry. I made a B last fall and a C in the spring. It was hell. Math has never been my forte. Hell, I’ve ranted on here about math in the past. But thanks to YouTube videos and intense studying (my notes), I made it through that goddamn class. But the worst part of it was my lab instructor. Now… I do realize that most students were 18-years-old, fresh out of high school, but I didn’t appreciate being talked down to or treated like a subhuman by the lab instructor, who did just that to everybody in the class. I could rant and rant about that, but I’ll leave it at that. I digress.

I changed my major back to general studies last month when I went to sign up for fall classes. I only have a few more credits to complete before I move on. This has been a journey of personal redemption for yours truly. I really fucked up back in 2009 by not withdrawing from classes properly. I had a 1.9 GPA when I returned to college in 2014… I’ve brought that puppy up to a 3.0 through plenty of hard work.

I changed my major because this last year destroyed my passion for wanting to be a physical therapist. “Destroyed” might be a dramatic way of putting it, but really, I just don’t give a shit. After all the math (chemistry + the developmental math class I was taking), my passion and drive was zapped. I just lack the desire to want to continue through all the future math classes. Why do I need calculus? What’s the point? It just feels so fruitless to me. I can’t dig deep enough to find a reason to move forward in that endeavor, y’know?

All the money in the world isn’t worth wasting time being miserable. You might say, “Bruh, just think, once you get through all that math, you’ll be done for good!” Yeah, so? I just don’t have the desire to tread through it. I’m fucking tired, man.

I haven’t been a regular ‘writer’ in forever. I used to write all the time. I used to feel like I could write, but the lack of practice fucked it all up. This is all word vomit. Apologies.

What’s next? I just want to be happy and do something I’m interested in. I don’t want to finish up the math I need at this community college only to transfer to a university to take more math classes and waste money from a loan to be fucking miserable.

Maybe I should be a history teacher. I feel like I have a strong voice; I love history. Why not?

My birthday is coming up in a couple of months. I feel like I’ve never worked a day in my life.

My girlfriend moved in with me last month. She works at a gas station (for now). I feel like I need to step my shit up in life to make her proud.

Lack of confidence in hopping out of my comfort zone even further is damaging me at the moment.

Word vomit.

Sick of What’s Going on in America

I just want the bullshit to blow over. Whatever is going on in America right now. I miss 2008 or I miss being naive. Human beings are gigantic assholes, and I don’t know why.

I think the black lives matter movement is misguided, power hungry cops are no bueno and that we all need to look at the media and shake our heads in disgust for the race war it is essentially creating.

All the rioting and violence won’t cause anything outside of resentment, anger and confirmation bias (for racists). Hate begets hate.

I feel like this kind of shit wasn’t around in 2008. I keep referencing 2008, because that was (probably) the best year of my life (so far). There wasn’t as much hate being slung around. Of course, that was right before social media began to truly take off. MySpace was still alive and well, and probably ahead of Facebook at that time (2009 was the year Facebook essentially took over). About a year later, Twitter’s popularity exploded. I don’t remember people being as reactionary back then as they are today, but again, the voice you had on the internet was different then than it is now.

It seems as though now people can’t wait to chime in with their opinion as soon as a news story drops. Instead of waiting for available information, they impulsively post their thoughts, as if they want to be the first to be heard, even while being ignorant of the facts.

You can see the worst of humanity in YouTube comments, Facebook post comments and on Twitter — probably in that order.

I’ve just been pretty depressed lately. Racial pride is fucking idiotic; at the same rate, being ashamed of the color of your skin is fucking silly, too (referencing dumbass white apologists).

There’s a problem with power hungry people in general in America. As for the black lives matter movement, why don’t black people in America recognize blacks killing blacks as a mega issue? This piss poor movement is nothing when blacks are killing blacks at a growing rate.

The media isn’t helping. Speaking out on the issue probably doesn’t help, either. Regarding what you say, you are either a “liberal cuck” or a “cuckserative”. Nobody can have a goddamn opinion anymore without being accused of leaning one way or another to one of the two major political parties in the United States.

Would it better to turn off the news, deactivate Facebook & Twitter and live your life? I’m beginning to think so! Ignorance is bliss!

We’re Just Two Lost Souls Swimming in a Fish Bowl, Year After Year

two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl year after year

Pink Floyd’s Wish You Were Here. My all-time favorite song. I’m 25-years-old and I fell in love with it back in in the year 2009, which was the year I graduated from high school, although the meaning of that song, subjectively to my heart, didn’t inflict me with any deep emotions until 2011.

In essence, Wish You Were Here reminds me of my first love.

Yes, the song’s original meaning is alleged to be about former Pink Floyd member Syd Barrett’s mental health, but to me, it’s simpler. It reminds me of my first love, and how she was, well, who she was during the first year and a half of our relationship and how she changed.

“We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl” takes me back to when we were just high schoolers, knowing nothing about the world or the future, just living day by day with big plans and heavy hearts. We thought we’d be together forever. We had big ideas.

In the most teenage ways possible, we changed. Most emphatically, she did, as she was the younger part of our relationship. I was her first boyfriend in general. Things didn’t end so well, and it wasn’t a mutual split, but that relationship ended nonetheless, and here I am. I don’t think about her all the time, but I do think about her often. She was my first love, after all. Nobody forgets their first love.

Every time I hear, “Wish You Were Here” I think about her, because a part of me does wish that 2008-2009 version of her was still here with the 2008-2009 version of myself.

We haven’t spoken in over two years.

This Is Your Song

How to Stop Procrastinating and Be More Productive

You can write that sentence (“how to stop procrastinating and be more productive”) into Google and find a number of websites with listed ways to thwart procrastination.

We all do it sometimes. Just admit it.

Here’s my one very simple tip:

Every day, in the evening, write out power goals for the next day. It can be three to five things, but never more than five. It can be something as simple as brushing your teeth or as complex as learning more about gas laws for your chemistry class. Power goals are for you, as a way to accomplish something in your life every day. It helps stave off mild depression and following through with your goals adds a sense of accomplishment and happiness in your life. It will affect the reward center of your brain, too.

Don’t write down more than five power goals, because you could overwhelm yourself or cause yourself to get off track. So, in review, at least three power goals and five at the most. Don’t be a hero or an overachiever (unless you are a psychopath).

That has nothing to do with procrastination, but the following paragraph does.

When you wake up in the morning, after you’ve ingested some caffeine or whatever it is that you do, get your biggest goal of the day over with. Just start it. When you wake up, your day’s slate is clean. You haven’t yet had the chance to procrastinate unless you are one of those people who grabs their phone and leans back in bed. Get up and devote five minutes to what it is that you need to get done.

Just start it as soon as you wake up.

procrastinating

Once you start and devote a few minutes to doing what you need to get done, you’ll find it easier to maintain the motivation to do it and you’ll be less likely to procrastinate.

Try it. Just do it. Let me know your feedback, strangers of the internet.

Being Loyal and Faithful is Boring

It really is.

Being a loyal and faithful partner to your significant other is boring. There’s no chaos to it. On the forefront, there’s no drama. There’s no thrills. There’s nothing to it. It’s one of the most boring things you can do in your life.

Yet I’d rather be a ‘boring‘ loyal and faithful human being to my woman than bounce around from girl to girl any day of the week.

Honestly, being loyal and faithful is the most underrated thing you can do in this world. “Live life abundantly”. I love that mindset. I’d rather live life abundantly with the same woman for the next 50 years of my life than rely on cheap thrills with girls I have no chemistry with.

Living your life with a clear conscience is the easiest thing you can do in your life. Let me post what Andy Frisella, a guy I look up to, said:

Growing up we all learn a lot of things.

We learn what to do.

We learn what not to do.

We learn what will get you punched in the face.

And we learn what will get your ass thrown in jail.

We learn these things from many different influences: Friends, family, teachers, peers, tv etc.
When I sit back and think about THE ABSOLUTE MOST IMPORTANT LESSON I HAVE EVER LEARNED…its a no brainer:

DO THE RIGHT THING

In business, as in life, along your journey people will lie, people will cheat, people will steal, people will pretend to be a friend to learn from you only to use that same information against you, they will smile in your face with zero integrity and wish bad upon you in that exact moment.

This is FACT.

It’s not “if” its “when”.

…but in the long run…if you stay true to yourself, focus on your mission & DO THE RIGHT THING you will ALWAYS win!

ALWAYS. ALWAYS. ALWAYS.

Do the right thing and everything will be OK.

If you do the right thing and live with a clear conscience, that opens your mind up for more room to store information. Instead of filling your brain with your own lies to cover your sorry, two-bit ass, you give way to new thinking, ideas, information and growth.

I read a blog recently about a young women who’s my age that is in a relationship with a married man who is ten years her senior. I am not going to judge her, but regardless of the semantics surrounding the situation it will not end well, long-term. A lot of young women fall into these traps with older married men, thinking the man will leave his wife for them. Maybe he will. Oftentimes the man does not, but maybe he will, and let’s say he does, but what about when she (the young woman in this scenario) grows older. The same man will step out on her, too. A leopard never changes his spots. People live through their habits. Nobody — you nor I — is an exception to our daily rituals and habits. It’s what defines us.

So, living life as a loyal and faithful partner is not boring. It’s really not. It’s underrated. It’s the most underrated fucking thing you can do in your life.

Check out the bestselling, ageless book The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz. He touched on this topic in that excellent read in 1959.

If you disagree, that’s OK. Good luck.

I’m not talking about the myth of the great American dream of the white picket fence. This has nothing to do with that.

You might try to argue that humans are naturally polygamous individuals. Maybe. Or maybe not. I’d rather live monogamously.

I’ve lost a lot of people in my short, 25 year life. A ton. I miss them all. I appreciate people’s presence in my life. I’m an atheist, ergo I don’t believe in an afterlife. I love and cherish each and every single day I get with the people I love around me. You never know what might happen. My cousin, who I was extremely close with as a kid, died in December at the age of 21 from accidental carbon monoxide poisoning. He was getting ready to go to work and left his car running in the garage of his apartment complex, in which the garage door was shut. It was a simple but fatal accident.

Anything can happen. You never know what might happen.

So, enjoy your days, love who you love and do the best you can.

Enjoy the positives but don’t take the negatives of life too harshly, because every problem you encounter in life is usually temporary. As Lynyrd Skynyrd’s Simple Man goes, “This too shall pass”.

Living with a clear conscience is easy.

Do What They Say You Couldn’t

Do the work. Do the fucking work. Just do it.

I began college in the fall of 2009. After one month, I only began attending my 8am English class, because that was the only time of the day I felt I could relax. I was in a failing, unhealthy relationship at the time that I prioritized over my education and future. It eventually faltered.

I dropped out of college with a 1.9 GPA. After half a decade of laziness and unremitting procrastination, I returned in the fall of 2014. Now I’m in the second year, busting my ass and doing the best I possibly can. I got comfortable with being uncomfortable. If I can do it, you can, too. Valid or not, excuses are excuses.

Don’t let your failures and setbacks hinder your future. Look through the windshield; not the rearview mirror. You are not your past or your previous mistakes/failures.

If anybody tries to make you feel small because of previous occurrences, kick them out of your life. If you can’t, then move. Get away where you can create a fresh start. If you can’t, because of a family tie, then compromise. Just do what you need to do. You are the person responsible for your successes. Not anybody else.

I can’t stress that enough.

I’ve been a loser for far too long, previous to 2014. You wouldn’t believe how lazy I was. I would wake up in the morning, walk around in circle in my house (a doublewide), around my living room, the dining room, kitchen and secondary living room, trying to piece together what had happened in late 2009 and the year 2010. I would replay my failures over and over again in my head for no good reason.

I would play Madden NFL Football on my Xbox 360. I’d play Call of Duty. Halo: Reach. It didn’t matter. I wasted so much time. I could’ve been learning a new science, brushing up on my math skills for the hell of it, reading more biographies. Doing anything.

No.

I dwelled on my past.

But I stopped doing it.

There was nothing in my past that I could garner anything else from. I made mistakes. I had to learn from them and I did. Everybody makes mistakes. Everybody has skeletons in the closet. Nobody is perfect. If you ever meet the perfect person, you better leave a comment on my blog letting me know, because I want to meet them and shake their hand, because that’d be a first. There’s no such thing.

Anything worth doing in life isn’t exactly easy.

Fuck easy.

“Easier said than done” is the biggest bullshit phrase ever concocted. Of course it’s easier said than done. Talking about the need to take a shit is easier than actually going to complete your daily number two, now isn’t it?

Remove that phrase from your vocabulary. Of course the desire to change your life is easier said than done. Anything worth doing is easier said than done.

You build habits one by one, like a brick mason laying down bricks. One by one, something is built upon. Maybe after the first few bricks, you can’t mentally imagine what is going on, but after fifty bricks have been laid you can see the process. It will be a tangible result. Rome wasn’t built in a day. The world keeps spinning no matter what the fuck you do.

And anything you do has nothing to do with being professional. Fuck being professional. The world doesn’t care about how professional you are. The world cares about results.

Life isn’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Thanks, Rocky.

Now do the fucking work. Only put off what you need to do for tomorrow if you are OK with dying having put it off.